Yeah, so I changed it

WordPress wanted me to upgrade this morning.  And I’m not good at avoiding such “in-your-face” reminder tactics.  So I upgraded.  And then I found out one of the new features is a nifty new theme browser and you know I just HAD to try that out.

And plus, I was kind of needing to change the design of this blog anyhow.  I loved the old one and it worked very well for me.  But I don’t think it worked that well for everyone else.  And it was just plain TIME.

So here ya go!  There will be more fiddling here and there as I see fit.  But I’m looking at a huge yarn backlog (meaning tons of knitting), some blog posts on my other blogs that I’m behind on, several days with visiting family and various and sundry other things that are occupying my attention at hte moment.  So basically… don’t hold your breath.

Do you like it?  I think I do.  Looks a bit brighter and fresher.  It’s nice to clear out hte cobwebs after winter is over, yes?

In other news:  I hate caffeine headaches.  (Wait, that isn’t really news, is it?)

Sunday Morning Slackers

I’m still considering locking things down around here.  What do you all think?  We could become the “Slacker” family (this of coruse assumes that we’re not already the slacker family) and the children could have amusing and appropriate nicknames.  I dunno.  It has it’s charms, right?

We’re not going to church this morning.  Good thing too, since church started a half hour ago.  Kile let me grab another hour of sleep this morning, bless his heart.  Evie just has this thing about waking up at 7:30, rain or shy, hell or high water.  So Kile got to sleep in yesterday and I got to sleep in today.  Works, don’t it?  It felt good too.  Of course, now I have a headache that I dare say is caffeine-related.  I’m having a cup of coffee as we speak so you’d think that’d help.  But it’s not Rockstar and perhaps that’s the problem.  I think it’s time that I admit I have a problem.

I’ve been a knitting fool this weekend (speaking of which, see the handy new project progress bars in my sidebar there?  Su-weet!).  My parents sent me some birthday money so I went out yesterday and got some yarn and another pair of circular needles.  I’m hoping to start a “longies” project for Evie this week.  If you don’t know what “longies” are, no worries.  They’re basically pants that are meant to be used also as a diaper cover.  I’m a little scared to start it, since it’ll involve a couple more complex moves I haven’t tried yet, such as short rows and the kitchener stitch, but I’m sure I’ll be able to figure it out too.  I didn’t spend a fortune on the yarn, since this is my “test” project anyhow. Meanwhile, Kile’s hat has remained untouched for the last several days and Harry’s scarf is getting longer and longer.  I took the “blob” that I started knitting with and turned it into a bag. Right now, I’m making up an “icord” to use as a strap.  I’m so crafty, I kill myself.

Speaking of my birthday (we were, weren’t we?), I had a rather nice time Friday night.  Kile made me some absolutely wonderful lobster ravioli with scampi sauce and ZOMG it was to die for.  I did get a cake and it was marvelous as all cakes virtually are.  Liam loved my cake most of all, I think.  Evie even got a taste of it off my finger and didn’t seem to know what to think of it.  I got presents too!  Slippers, fleecy jammies and a robe.  These are good things to have in a house as frigid as ours, especially since a storm blew through Friday night that has caused the daytime high to top out around 30 degrees.  Good times.

On the whole, it’s been a nice weekend.  I can’t believe Christmas is almost upon us (gulp), but am ready to embrace it.  I don’t think we’re going anywhere today and that’s just fine by me because we are still having to ride around in Kile’s van and the alignment is off or something because it shakes and rattles something fierce and basically makes me want to freak the heck out.  So the less time I have to ride around in that thing, the better.

Okay.  Back to my knitting.  The only thing I have to decide is… start the longies or work on another project?  Decisions, decisions!

(okay, this is the SECOND time I’ve thought I’ve published an entry and I haven’t in as many days.  I completely blame the new WordPress version.)

Whoops! They're escaping again!

Here’s some more thoughts.  They’re trying to make a break for it, so I better write them down first.  I guess I didn’t empty my head well enough yesterday.  You think after almost four years of blogging I would know better by now.

  • I updated to WordPress 2.7 this morning.  It was surprisingly painless.  I only had to deactivate one plugin and I did that before I upgraded.  I like the interface MUCH better and I feel like I can customize everything a lot more to my wishes (and demands *cackle*).
  • Of course, now I feel like my blog needs something new and shiny as a result.  After all, now that the “backend” is looking so spiffy, that change needs to be reflected on the front end as well.  However, I still love my design so I’m not sure what this would entail.  A new plugin?  Hmm.  Must think about this one some more.
  • I’ve got about nine inches of red scarf finished so far.  I’m making this one for Harry, on some soft, acrylic yarn that he picked out at the craft store.  I’m doing a rib knit on it (K2P2, for those in the know) and it’s looking great and all but DANG, it’s getting a little boring.  Whenever I get too tired of it, I switch to working on Kile’s cap (in a heathered dark grey acrylic yarn), but his hat is in the ribbed stage as well.  SIGH.
  • This could be why I’m knitting in my sleep these days.
  • I’m also spending a lot of time on the goodmama thread over at Diaper Swappers.  This could also be why I was buying diapers in my sleep last night as well (when I wasn’t knitting, that is).
  • I think I need a life.
  • Mah birfday is tomorrow!  However, I don’t think I’m in any way going to get the kind of attention and adoration Rhi got for her birthday with all the posts that sang her praises.  Whatever.  Attention hog. *wink*
  • I need a shower and with both of the wee ones taking naps right now, I could take one.  But I’ve sorta grown to enjoy taking one at night after I get Evie to bed.  It’s a very relaxing way to finish the day and my hair has enough time to dry before I go to bed myself.
  • Kile did not mail off all our packages yesterday.  He stopped after three because the cost started to scare him.  SIGH.  This is officially going to be His Deal, not mine.  And on that note, why does it cost so much in this day and age (and yes, even with the gas prices which really aren’t so bad right now anyhow) to ship something across country?  It’s goofy!  Overnight, Two-Day, Priority… those I can almost understand.  But First Class and Parcel Post should be a LOT cheaper than they generally end up being.  Makes one wonder why they don’t have a “Strap to the back of a passing burro” option.  I’m thinking that could be a lot more affordable.
  • And while I’m ranting about the Post Office… It happened AGAIN yesterday.  Kile brought home the mail from our box (we have one of those “community” box thingies down around the corner from our house) and in it was a “Sorry we missed you” package delivery slip.  Normally, they give you those when a package is too big to fit in the little locker thingie and you aren’t home when they bring it to your door and it needs a signature.  But no one EVER came to the door.  Our mail man has been getting VERY lazy.  He doesn’t even TRY to come up to the door to see if someone is home (and yes, I’m pretty much ALWAYS home because I’m a total hermit).  He just puts that slip in the mailbox and we have to go down to the post office (a good ways away from here too, down the interstate) to pick it up. I tried last night to go on the website and arrange for a redelivery but they wouldn’t even give me the OPTION to have it redelivered.  I even tried to send them a pointed note saying “STOP IT!  BRING PACKAGES TO MY DOOR!” and that “failed” out.  Grr.  The Post Office is OFFICiALLY On Notice.

Ahem.  There.  I feel much better now.  Hopefully this brain-emptying will stick this time.  I really don’t have a lot of room to spare in there, you know?

It must be a day for memes

So I was tagged for this one by a lovely gal named Susan.  Tagged!  Me!  Doesn’t happen very often.  And I like to try to obey when it does.  So even though I did a big ol’ long meme this morning I’m doing another one this afternoon.  You’re just gonna have to deal with it.

Four places I go over and over:

  1. Whole Foods.  We just cannot stay away.  I think Kile is even more affected by it than I am.  He can’t resist the cheese counter and I am always and forever drooling over the baked goods.
  2. Sam’s Club.  Not only do they have the cheapest lunch in town (hot dog and a soda for $1.50!), but there’s always plenty to look at there.  Not to mention all the free samples.  And the cheap milk.
  3. Walmart.  Yeah, this surprises no one.  But I can’t resist the rock-bottom prices on my grocery items.
  4. Smiths.  It’s the closest store to our house and when we need to pick something up quick, that’s where we go.

Four places I’d rather be right now:

  1. Asleep.  I pretty much always would like to be asleep over anything else.
  2. On a beach somewhere.  Sans children, of course.  I love them but sometimes a break would be nice.
  3. Visiting my dear friend Brit.  She’s a rock.
  4. Nowhere.  I’m pretty much a homebody and being here at home is almost always exactly where I want to be.

Four TV shows I watch:

  1. “How I Met Your Mother”
  2. “Real Time with Bill Maher”
  3. “True Blood”
  4. “Fringe”

Four things I eat for breakfast:

  1. Cereal.  More often than not, I have cereal for breakfast.  Not exciting, but what can ya do?
  2. Bagel with cream cheese.  I love bagels.  MMM!
  3. Biscuits or cinnamon rolls.  This is mostly on weekends.
  4. French toast.  One of my favorite breakfasts of all time.

Four animals I like best:

  1. I’m pretty fond of rat terriers, which is why we have two of them.
  2. I’d love to have a bearded dragon lizard someday.  I’ve always thought they were cool.
  3. Yeah, I’m one of those people who thinks hedgehogs are pretty darn cute these days.
  4. Cats.  Yeah, I guess I still like them, despite the horror that was Tiger.

Four beaches I’ve been to:

  • Capitola Beach in Capitola, CA.
  • New Brighton Beach State Park.  We used to go camping there every summer when I was a kid.
  • Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk.  A must-visit every summer for thrill rides and cute lifeguards.
  • Some nude beach near Santa Cruz.  I didn’t know it was a nude beach beforehand and I was only ten when my brother and his girlfriend took me and my friend there.  Did they know?  I never found out.

Four people I am tagging: You know I’m crappy at tagging people.  So I’m not going to.  Simple as that.

I'm all over it

I caught this particular meme over at Sizzle’s joint and you know me.  It’s a weekend, I’m tired and a good, fun, meme is just what the doctor ordered.  I did what any self-respecting blogger would do: I blatantly stole it.  I swear, I even used a lot of her choices.  I’M SO ORIGINAL.  I couldn’t stop there and had to steal some of the choices from the gal she got the idea from in the first place.  So that makes me DOUBLY original.  So here you go (and now you know how screwed up my priorities REALLY are):

  • coffee over tea
  • bed head over flat iron
  • Grey’s Anatomy over ER
  • the movie over the book (generally because I lack time for the book, even though the book is almost ALWAYS better.  However, if the movie is really good I will usually read the book and prefer it.)
  • the Jackson Five over the Keating 5
  • roses over dahlias
  • acoustic guitar over electric guitar
  • the theater over the sports arena
  • sitting in the audience over talking to the crowd (this should come as no surprise to anyone)
  • tacos over burritos (interesting… ten years ago I would have said the opposite!)
  • yoga pants over running shorts (the main problem with the latter being that they’re SHORTS)
  • Twitter over IM
  • painted toenails over painted fingernails (I think painted toenails are a necessity in the summer months, if not all year long)
  • silence to noise
  • sunset over sunrise (one requires me to up early and the other does not)
  • American Idol over American Gladiator
  • getting wet over using an umbrella (umbrellas have never seemed to be worth the trouble)
  • peanut butter over jelly
  • Jon Stewart over John McCain (was there ever a question???)
  • humming over whistling
  • Stacy over Clinton (though I’d probably be just as happy to have both of them raid my wardrobe)
  • breakfast over lunch (breakfast is one of my favorite meals to order in a restaurant)
  • Winter over Autumn (but just barely.  Still, nothing can compete with snow.)
  • Henry Rollins over Henry Fonda
  • pants over dresses (I want to love dresses, but they’re just so darned drafty)
  • following over leading
  • nights over mornings
  • sitting still over dancing (though it really does depend on the song)
  • the beach over the desert (by FAR and it’s not just about the waves)
  • smiling over frowning
  • tanned over freckles (though my skin would beg to differ)
  • brain fart over brain freeze (seriously, the latter can just really hurt, as I’ve recently discovered)
  • eating a pickle over being in a pickle (then again, I’ve enjoyed pickles since I was knee high to a grasshopper)
  • making people laugh over making people cry
  • Christmas over birthdays (everyone gets into Christmas.  No one gives a shit about my birthday.)
  • chaos over organization (I’d like to say the opposite, but have you seen my house??)
  • being the passenger over being behind the wheel (I’ve never really liked driving that much)
  • ketchup over salsa
  • Hillary over Bill (it used to be the other way around, but this particular election left a bad taste in my mouth)
  • too cold over too hot (how is it that I’m not living in Alaska??)
  • manicures over massages
  • essay writing over test taking (I could always bs my way through an essay much easier than straightforward test questions)
  • Woody Allen over Woody Harrelson
  • Jefferson over Washington
  • salt over pepper
  • Llyod Dobbler over Ferris Buller
  • Everyone over Karl Rove (I blame him entirely for the atrocity that is George W. Bush)
  • Rachel Maddow over Everyone (I puffy pink heart love her)
  • too fast over too slow
  • doctor visits over dentist visits (by FAR.  As reluctant as I’ve been to go to the doctor, I haven’t been to the dentist in over TEN YEARS)
  • star gazing over Star! reading
  • house salad over Caesar salad (and, for whatever reason, I really like it with ranch dressing and salt)
  • Nicole over Paris (one is at least TRYING to be a responsible adult)
  • cocktails over beer (I just don’t like the taste of most beer)
  • not trying over making the mistake
  • milkshake over smoothies (I HATE smoothies)
  • Reno over Las Vegas (duh)
  • fruit over chocolate (give me strawberry ice cream ANY DAY)
  • knee high boots over stilettos (or really, pretty much any kind of shoe over any other kind of shoe with a heel)
  • Matt over Ben
  • avoidance over confrontation
  • Italian food over Chinese food
  • too much over too little (unfortunately for me and my messy house)
  • Pride and Prejudice over Sense and Sensibility (but just barely because I liked both) (and I am ashamed to say that I’m talking about the movies here)
  • CBS over NBC (one has “How I Met Your Mother”, one does not)
  • spending over saving (sadly.  Fortunately there isn’t much to spend!)
  • salty over sweet (generally but not always.  but generally)
  • dogs over cats (another one that I wouldn’t have guessed ten years ago)
  • OBAMA over Hillary
  • lipgloss over lipstick
  • J.K Rowling over J.R. R Tokien
  • Jennifer Garner over Jennifer Lopez (EASY)
  • sense of humor over sense of style
  • Jeopardy! over Wheel of Fortune
  • pro-choice over pro-life (but only politically)
  • Rockstar over Coke
  • The Breakfast Club over Dirty Dancing
  • pirates over ninjas
  • Stewart over Colbert
  • french toast over french fries
  • Ariel over Cinderella
  • The Oscars over The Olympics
  • Steve over Joe (any “Blue’s Clues” fan will agree with me)
  • “Armageddon” over “Deep Impact”
  • Sawyer over Jack
  • iPhone over any other cellphone
  • Wii over Xbox 360
  • minivan over SUV

Okay, that’s enough.  I think I could probably keep this going all day long.  So what do you think?  Do you agree with me or do you think I’m messed in the head?  Go ahead.  You can tell me.  I can take it.

Photo Phriday

I’m just too clever for words, aren’t I?  And I am SO glad to see Friday.  Was it just me or was it a LOOOONG week?  Of course, there are no guarantees that the weekend will be smooth, calm, relaxing or pleasant but a break is a break.  And I need a BREAK.

Anyhow, I wanted to share some pictures with you today.  Because it’s a Friday and it’s time to let our hair down and just take it easy and look forward to doing some fun and easy things, right?  And what is more fun and more easy than photos?  NOTHING, that’s what.


Is there anything more precious than a toddler squatting to play with toys?

You snap enough pictures of Evie and eventually you get one of her looking pleased with herself.

Pup/Holly/Poptart (dog of three names) misses Harry while he’s in Elko

A couple of these pictures were taken with a camera Kile brought home from work and I am SO IN LOVE.  I hardly had to edit this in Photoshop, it came out so well.  It’s my new favorite picture of Liam.

Saucer Girl
I’d like to know who on earth could ever resist those dimples.

Beetoe.  The work camera also worked great on her.

Brit is now my favorite person
Brit sent us a little “care package” including some of her cloth diapers, a tie dyed onesie for Evie, an ADORABLE drawstring bag and a Forks, WA t-shirt!  I love her.

Forks t-shirt!
FORKS, people!  I’m so wearing this to the “Twilight” premiere.

Virginia City with the In-Laws

As I mentioned last week, my in-laws came to stay with us on Thursday.  Luckily, we were able to get the house pretty much under control by then.  And I feel I should probably say again (though I have said it before) that I get along great with my in-laws.  I am really lucky in that regard.  So when they said they would be going to Virginia City on Friday afternoon and asked if me and the kids wanted to go along, well, sure I did!

I’d only been to Virginia City once before.  Kile and I had gone up for the day once when Harry was just a baby.  So I was interested to go back and see if it was like I remembered.  It’s an interesting town.  The entire village is a historical monument and is filled with Civil War Era homes and buildings and while there is a lot there that is falling down around the knees, it’s also got a lot of character.  It’s also VERY touristy.  For instance, the first shop we went into was a leather goods store that boasted everything they sold was $20 or less.  No foolin’!  (I almost bought a purse there.)

There are people who are paid to dress up in period-style costumes and walk the streets, talking to tourists and posing for pictures.  There’s a horse-drawn carriage for rides, a trolly car that drives around the various historical landmarks and more saloons in a one mile radius than I think I’ve ever seen before in my life.  Not only are there a lot of saloons, but there’s a lot of CANDY.  There are several shops devoted entirely to ice cream, candy, fudge or whatever else.  Most of the candy and fudge is made on the premises and I couldn’t resist getting a 1/2 pound of sinful peanut brittle for Kile.  We stopped for ice cream cones and Harry’s eyes about fell out of his head.  That was the highlight of his day, perhaps even his week.   The cones were amazing and even Liam loved sharing my strawberry cheesecake ice cream with me.

The kids were actually pretty well-behaved.  We left after a couple hours and drove back through Carson City on our way to Reno.  I sat in the back of my in-laws truck, between the two car seats and if I wasn’t getting smacked by Liam, I was getting clawed by Evie.  We had to pull off the road at one point so I could feed Evie, and I was impressed that she’d gone as long as she had before wanting to eat.  We met up with Kile and my sister-in-law’s family who had just gotten to town and had dinner at the Olive Garden.  Needless to say, it was a LONG day.  But fun was had and isn’t that the point?

While you wait!
This is the place to get a beaver felt custom made hat while you wait

Bell Tower
Lots of museums in this town too.  But oh, the brick is so pretty.

For Brit
I saw this and thought of a particular someone.

Ponderosa Saloon
Harry desperately had to use the bathroom so we stopped at this saloon to use their facilities.  They had lots of grisly paintings on the wall.  Like this one.

An absolutely gorgeous church.

Harry got busted.  Interestingly enough, they let him keep his ice cream cone.

Do I buy it?  Not for all the gold in Virginia City.

The view goes on and on
Quite the view.

Main Street, Virginia City
It really is a cute little town.  I’d like to have a decent camera and spend a day there sometime.

She had fun
Evie enjoyed herself too.


You might be expecting to see my weekly “You Need to Read” feature here.  I hate to say, however, that if you’re looking for it that you’re about to be disappointed.  However, I’m reassured by the belief that not that many of you will be looking for it anyhow.  Could be that the only person who will really notice it’s absense is me.

I’m taking a little break from YNTR.  I may even take a little break from the blog altogether.  I haven’t entirely decided yet.  I just know that I woke up this morning and the last thing I felt like doing was putting up that list.  And once I got over feeling guilty about it (okay, that’s a lie, I still feel guilty), I decided I should post something.



It’s probably just your average blog-funk.  Everyone gets them.  First, I didn’t feel like doing the WordPress Bootcamp, now the YNTR list and maybe next week it’ll be blogging altogether.  I don’t want it to really come to THAT, so I’m trying to cut this funk off at the pass.  Stop it in it’s tracks, if you will.

For now, let’s just call it a break.  Not just a break from YNTR, but a break from the blog.  Chances are, it’ll only be for the weekend.  Shoot, it might only be for a couple of hours.  I may be back here tonight with some frittering nonsense to bore you to tears with.  In the meantime, I’ll leave you with this precious moment…


Do I really love TV?

After yesterday’s post, wherein I alienated a large part of my readership (at least this time I know why my stats went down!) (I kid!  I kid!), I started to wonder if in fact I really could consider myself a television fan since there are so many hit shows that I have never watched and never want to watch.  Should my badge identifying me as a TV Lover be revoked?  I mean, it sure seems like the TV is on an awful lot around here.  So what DO I watch if not the super-cool hawt shows that everyone else is watching?

(Good thing for you I’m out of posting ideas and don’t feel up to a WordPress Bootcamp today because I’m totally going to answer that.)

  • As I mentioned yesterday, “True Blood” on HBO is a new favorite of mine.  The unorthodox marketing campaign captured my interest and I was already sorta into the whole vampire thing from reading “Twilight”.  Luckily, Kile was also interested in it so we tuned in.  And once my prudish self gets over all the nudity (holy naked moses, batman!), it’s really an awesome show.  Even though I’m having a hard time getting used to seeing Anna Paquin with blonde hair.
  • Also am big time loving on “Fringe“.  Initially, I planned to maybe give it a look because of J.J. Abrams involvement.  Though I was concerned about it being on FOX and all (I’m still mad at FOX for burying and then murdering “Firefly“).  Then I saw a few ads that made it clear that Joshua Jackson was one of the stars.  That was all it took.  I’m a Pacey fan from way back, ya’ll.  And it doesn’t hurt that the show is mad bizarre.
  • I have mentioned before that I watch syndicated episodes of “Touched by an Angel” during the day.  The episodes are a little schmaltzy, but I enjoy them so much.  I generally watch these while the two little ones are napping and before Harry gets home from school.  I don’t have time to do it every day, but when I do it’s like heaven.  It’s one little slice of “me time” that I can halfway depend upon.
  • I have sick love for “Lost“.  I remember the ads for the season premiere of it all those years ago.  I admit, I was drawn in by the plane crash.  Call it a morbid fascination, if you will.  But I do recall that it was the season premiere I was most looking forward to because it looked so cool on the commercials.  It ended up being an entirely different sort of show than I was expecting but that was in a good way.  I’d never seen anything like it before and I LOVED IT.  Haven’t missed an episode yet.  (I didn’t even give up on it in season 3 like everyone else did.  Brownie points for me!)
  • I watch “The Amazing Race” virtually every season.  I say “virtually” because I have missed a season here and there and episodes as well.  But it is my most favorite of all the reality shows.  This may or may not have something to do with Phil.
  • Kile and I enjoy watching Bill Maher on HBO.  We don’t always agree with him and sometimes I find his particular brand of “comedy” a little on the harsh side, but we do enjoy the arguments that take place on that show sometimes.  The week before last had some good ones.  We missed last week because our DVR went apeshit and deleted all our scheduled recordings.
  • How could I leave off “How I Met Your Mother“?  Neil Patrick Harris rocks my socks.
  • Also, a huge fan of “The Office.”  Last night was the premiere and I have to admit that the end totally took me by surprise.  But then, Jim said it would take us by surprise, didn’t he?  Sneaky, sneaky!

There are also some shows that we catch fairly regularly, but not regularly enough to be on our “list”.  Shows like “House” and “Deadliest Catch” and “30 Rock” (I wish I could say we watched that one more regularly but a lot of times we, uh, forget).  But chances are, if you were to fire up our DVR you’d see recordings of kid’s movies like “Curious George”, “Over the Hedge” and “Happy Feet”, kid’s shows like “Blue’s Clues”, “The Backyardigans” and “Jack’s BIg Music Show”, and more adult movies like “You, Me and Dupree” and “Knocked Up”.  Movies take precedence over tv shows on the DVR.  We’re big movie people around here.  So maybe I am a fan of TV, just that I like to watch movies more than television shows.  Hmm.  Could be.

So what are your favorites?  And did you watch “The Office” last night?  Tell me… did you see it coming??


It would seem that my frustration from yesterday did not dissipate overnight like I had hoped it would.  Then again, I’m not sure why I expected it to since Evie is in the throes of teething and wanted to use me as a pacifier all night long.  My rest wasn’t exactly restful.

My resentment, therefore, has only multiplied and today hasn’t gotten off to a very good start.  I suppose this means I should be paying extra attention to “Blue’s Clues” this morning, as the lesson is in how to best deal with frustration (“Stop.  Breathe.  And think!”).  Somehow, though, I just don’t think that’s going to work for me today.

Thank you to everyone who posted words of encouragment on my little rant yesterday.  I was worried that my hormones had gotten the better of me and that I had overreacted.  And while I probably did at least a little, hearing that what this office did was pretty shitty after all really helped.  So thanks.  Sometimes, a person just needs to hear that they aren’t completely batshit crazy.

Today would be the day I would normally post a WordPress Bootcamp but you’ll have to forgive me if I’m not exactly feeling it.  I might do it tomorrow or I might put it off until next week.  We’ll see how many chidren survive the day today and how I feel about life at the end of it.

Is it possible to be both angry and tired at the same time?  And when I say angry, I really mean a range of negative emotions that include frustrated (“Stop.  Breathe.  And think!”), sad, guilty, annoyed, and resentful.  I feel so angry that I practically shake.  And at the same time, I’m so tired that I feel like I could fall asleep right here (perhaps even with my eyes open).  I want to crawl up into bed (perhaps even alone for a change, no offense, Evie) and sleep for weeks on end.  I want to just forget my responsibilities and float away.  At least for a little while (until the guilt got to be too much).

See, even now I’m feeling guilty for this post even existing and I’m tempted to just erase it and pretend it never existed.  But I’m going to go ahead and post it anyhow, before I let the guilt take over.